A Case Against Hand-Held Devices

16 Saturday Mar 2013

Posted by in Family Ties

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It was just before Christmas.  We were traveling home from Augusta where we’d met good friends for dinner.  We were seeing snow fall for the first time since before we’d left for Korea.

The argument between the kids started over a game on the ipad.  Something about gathering gems, racing to a castle, somersaulting around the candy store and destroying the Tooth Fairy.  The details are vague.

First — Garrett.  He’s very I’m 13 and also a little bit John Wayne lately.  He claimed he got to play some asinine game twice because it took him half as long to get through one game…(say wha-?)

Luke, much more I have no power here so I will whine in the most ingratiating way humanly possible retorted Gaaarrett doooonnnn’ttt! That’s not faaaiiirrrr!  

And there was Natalie, who never seemed to notice they skipped her turn half the time, was seemingly thinking the boys are gonna argue, so I’m just going to sit here in my booster seat and sing to myself LOUDER NOW ‘oh, give me the ipad, give it to meeeeee…’

…when one of us big people in charge, I don’t remember if it was me or Guy, snapped “give. me. the. ipad.  NOW.”  And it was handed up through little hands and breaking hearts.  At least that’s what I thought I heard.  It could have been the sound of me grinding my teeth.

The silence made Guy and me smirk at each other out of the corner of our eyes.  We’d surprised even ourselves with lowering the gauntlet over something so silly.  No warnings.  Just – no.

You have to understand, silence is not common in our lives.  We were all kind of stunned.  I think the kids were more than just a little dazed, and maybe seething at each other a bit.  We all focused on the road in front of us as snow fell.

Then, Natalie, having immediately forgotten that we’d just admonished them for bickering, started humming “Frosty the Snowman” absentmindedly.  Soon, Luke joined in with a word here and there, softly, still looking out the window and away from his siblings.  Garrett joined in (with harmony, no less) soon after, and before we’d gone another mile, the five of us were singing at the top of our lungs and half laughing like crazy kookaburras.

Without words, someone started another holiday song, and though we didn’t know all the words to even one of them, we sang, all together that way, until we made it home safe and sound.

I had forgotten about this night until two days ago, when Natalie, completing an assignment for school, said to me “my favorite day was singing in the car in the snow!”

And I realized the ipad hadn’t made its way back inside the car in the past 3 months.

Highights of My Week

08 Friday Mar 2013

Posted by in Uncategorized

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1.  Took Luke to Aubuchon Hardware where he chose two patterned rolls of duct tape for a “handbag project”.  He chose rainbow paint splotches, and turqoise and purple animal print, declaring them “manly.”

2.  Had my principal email to tell me I had worn a shirt that was inappropriate and distracting.  And by this highlight, I mean lowlight.

3.  Got to see Matchbox 20 in concert.  Found 4.2 more reasons to feel that getting older doesn’t totally suck.  That Rob Thomas, I am Telling.  You.

4.  Was told we’d be getting a sizable tax return.  Also, I just learned how to spell sizable correctly.

5.  3 and 1/2 months of 60-minute daily swim practices,  22 hours spent at swim meets, 4 vats of chili offered at concessions — with 9 minutes spent actually cheering Luke on during races — have finally ended.  Quietish night at home eating dinner together as a family? Four nights in a row? Priceless.

6.  Discovered what I consider to be a common-sense approach to eating and fitness at GOKALEO.  Started eating more food.  Lost weight.  Admittedly, this highlight started several weeks ago, but it’s still pretty great.

7.  Was able to do 9 diamond push-ups in my P90X workout.  9!  On my feet!  Couldn’t do even 1 when I started.

8.  It didn’t snow.  Much.

9.  Figured out a reason why I learned geometry in high school.  So I could deduce Garrett’s argument about why playing video games when you’re home sick is okay, even though the rule is NO GAMES on school days down to “A plus B does not equal C. And also, A minus C does not equal B.  Therefore, C divided by A can’t be B.”  Since he has not learned geometry yet, this went over very well.  Bam!

10.  Decided that lists need not be even-numbered.  Realized I’m a little OCD on this.  Figured it’s something I can work on.

And how was your week, ya’ll?

Let It Begin Again

02 Saturday Mar 2013

Posted by in Sans Therapist

≈ 8 Comments

I ran into a friend last night who I haven’t seen since before I left for Korea.  I think very highly of this woman, a miracle worker with kids who struggle with reading…brilliant intellectual and a biker babe, all wrapped into one. I was very happy to be at the Matchbox 20 concert – ohmyRobThomashotness – but I was happier, still, to have seen my friend.  (Hi Phyllis!  This one’s for you!)

So when she hugged me and told me that she often checks to see if I’ve updated my blog, I felt sheepish.  I haven’t written in this thing for months.  Months I tell you!

When I said that I’ve been very lazy busy, she understood.  Educators are busy people yaddayaddayadda.  I ventured to explain that though I love, love, love writing, that it makes me feel alive, it doesn’t seem real to me that anyone would really care about what I have to say.  She cracked me up when she said “it’s not about what you say. It’s just the writing I enjoy.”

Truth?  I could not be happier that no one is caring or paying attention to what I have to say.  I mean it sincerely.  It might help me get started again.  Read on.

Anne Lamott says that basically a writer should write as though there is no audience.  Actually, I think she said that you should write as though your parents are dead.  But what she meant was, that THAT way, the presumed offenses (because they’re probably all in my head) won’t matter at all and won’t make me so pinned with fear that I stop altogether.  Fear of what, you ask?

Do you know how many times I’ve written entire blogs and deleted them because I just didn’t sound … enough?  Tolerant enough?  Patient enough?  Liberal enough?  Conservative enough?  Smart enough?  Positive enough?  A good enough mother?  A good enough wife?  Friend?  Sister?  Daughter?  Auntie?  Teacher? Nice enough?

I didn’t sound nice enough.  It sounds so dumb out there in words.

Too many, that’s how many.

Ugh.  I get in my own damn way a terrible amount of the time.

The truth is, writing should be the baring of a soul.  If I write with a censor, let’s call her Balls-of-Goo, I’m simply not opening up enough to make the writing true.

I thought about these things on the (white-knuckled, harrowing) drive home from the concert. (Geez, weatherpeople, you didn’t see that snow and ice coming, did you?)  I thought about it a lot.  And I woke up this morning with a renewed sense of excitement about writing.

I updated the blog.  Chose a ‘theme’ for the appearance of it that I like a lot, one I created some time ago, and think fits the tone, and decided to make my writing a discipline.  This means two things: one, I will set a goal of writing 2 blogs per week and two, I will write without my stupid over-cautious inner censor, the aforementioned Balls-of-Goo.

That said:  for the record, and I’m just wading in here:  I don’t like whining and I never have.  I make a shit ton of mistakes in all areas of my life, and believe me when I say I am harder on myself than anyone reading this blog could ever be.  If I’m going to write, I better develop that thick skin I put into practice every day in my classroom with my teenagers.  Also, I better get my ass in gear.  I’m 40.  That’s past mid-life for a whole lot of us.

Thanks for the kick in the ass, Phyllis.  I’m on it.