This past Thursday, with 2 weeks to go until we fly 30 hours to get to Daegu, we still didn’t have our Visas. It was precarious. We were starting to have conversations with Bokyung, in the DIS office, about pushing back our fly date, about having to get substitutes to begin our school year, about being fired…Oy. Thanks to the hard workers at Susan Collins’s offices, our lengthy process is almost complete. Just a couple of VIN #’s and a trip to the Korean Consulate left to seal the deal.
Except. I had this prayer out there in the universe —it went something like this: dear god, it’s almost time for us to go. if, for some reason, we are not supposed to do this, you better send a sign – and it better be big – ‘cuz i am almost completely packed, which is really saying something.
And god said – Garrett will fall out of a tree and break his pelvis. Guy’s grandmother will die. Guy’s father, appearing to sufficiently heal from his 3rd hip replacement, will suffer a heart attack, need to be put into a coma and will remain unconscious until further notice. Two of your good friends will deal with cancer in mysterious and terrifying ways, and there will be nothing you can do about it.
And I, taken completely aback, answered, alrighty then.
So, my question is this: are these signs (enormous, without question) supposed to keep us here? Or, is this god’s way of saying Life Goes On. No matter when we leave, how far we go, how long we stay…we’re going to miss things here. Big, important things. Things in the lives of people we love and want to be here for. Frankly, it feels absolutely selfish to be leaving. What is life if not for the people with whom you share it? It’s not like I can easily hop a flight home.
No answers. Only questions.